Second iPhone App

Got my second iPhone app out, check out Funky Face!!

Iphone app

I have a program available on iTunes, check it out.

JeadsBeads

My wife and mother have been working on making handmade jewelry and are beginning to look at selling it. To check out what they have go to their blog here. Also, please spread the word.

Thanks

Reboot imminent

I have been getting through slowly but surely the last few weeks, it
has been a roller coaster. I am thinking of restarting my blog in some
ways and maybe taking a little bit different direction, but I still
have to see.

Work is still there not really all that bad as long as I can just do
my work and not get strangeness dumped on me. We found a renter for a
condo and I am working on getting a job so this crazy adventure may
actually work easier than it could have.

Get to do some packing tonight I'll see how that goes. It will be nice
to get out of here and see Jane and Gwen.

I think I will sign off for now.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Another day

Well the day is started it is Monday and I am off to work. Hopefully
this week ends better off than it began. I have some hope foe things
to happen this week for two of the jobs I have applied for and maybe
some interviews could even happen.

We will have another person looking at the condo for renting tonight
so that will be nice I am going to try and do a better job with
showing it.

In some ways it would be a lot nicer to just get it sold off or
something, buy I am not going to hold my breath on that. I guess that
is it for now.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Train station

I got done with work as I posted with my text message. I am standing
at one of the train stations where I have an intenet connection an
figures I could do another quick post.

Today went well enough although my job is not the easiest to do when
you are completely alone because the nature of it is reading and
typing and the reading gets hard when I am doing it straight for even
just a couple hours.

People have problems. There is this guy swearing out loud to no one
in particular. It is sad how bad peoples language is sometimes. Silly
and immature if you ask me.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Saturday makes for a rough work day. Since no one is around it is quiet and frustrations seem to be worse. Survived though

Got going and didn't stop

Twice today I kept going after I hit a stopping point. The previous
post was the second ocurrence, the first was catching my bus. I
hesitated and almost changed my travel strategy losing time enough
that route 1 failed and 2 along with it. So I had started on foot and
kept going arriving eventually at another train station quite a
distance and a good 40 minutes or so later.

It was good exercise and an enjoyable walk. There are some beautiful
houses coming down off the hill from the university large pieces of
land also that make for some cool landscaping as well.

I enjoyed the walk and I might do it again sometime when I am wearing
some decent walking shoes. (ouch)

Hagoni

Super Guy
(on the move)

Copy and Paste

I really need copy and paste to do justice to this post, but I will
give the general idea anyway. Can "sanctions" imposed against a
country affect the government, yet not the citizens? That sounds
absolutely ridiculous to me, but AP attributed the idea to or Defense
Secretary.

This was regarding North Korea, can we really think that in doing
something to "the communist government" that it wouldn't be reflected
in the lives of the the citizens?

I think a good comparison might be if someone were to punish head of
households by reducing his ability to earn money. Does this affect his
family? You bet it does, they have to compensate or endure.

Similarly we could look at a business example let's say manufacturing.
If trade with the company is blocked to some degree then production
would most likely have to be reduced and this hurts the workers who
might be laid off.

Other thoughts on government.

Government consists of the people, it is the people, if they refuse
the current establishment they "can" (to varying degrees) change it.

Our government was established on the principle that government exists
by the consent of the governed check the Declaration of Independance.
The declaration was made by "the Authority of the good People" do we
realize that we have authority? We do have authority as long as we
remember and are willing to exercise it, but if we forget then our
authority begins to erode as we yield our rights to the governing
until our ability to change things may be nearly gone, or at least
seemingly so.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Blogging for the sake of blogging

Today I am writing simply because. I am hoping to finish my work week
today I just have to put in an extra 1 1/2 hours over my now customary
10. Then I get a day before returning on Saturday to put in some
hours. At least that is the current plan it might change by the end of
the day.

I showed our condo last night to some potential renters. I hope they
get back to me sooner rather than later whether they want it or not.
Then at least I don't have the nagging wonder of whether I still need
to find someone else.

Not much to say today I guess just going to try and get though work.

Chao

Super Guy
(on the move)

Over Excited

So with the prospects of actually being able to move looking on the
horizon I am getting excited and even a little anxious about what I
might be able to accomplish. For example I have a few jobs that I have
applied to that would be really nice jobs to get. I actualy had
another call on our condo tonight after I fixed my classified listing.
(moutain!=mountain, ask wikipedia what != means)

So just maybe we will be able to move one of these days. One thing I
am looking forward to when I can Get settled is doing some writing. I
don't mean blog writing however, but program writing I have been
talking with a friend about some ideas for projects and I hope to make
some of them a reality when I am a little more free to explore those
options.

It will be good to be creating some programs again and maybe be
delving deeper into that skill. There is always the hope that it could
prove to be a source of revenue as well to help support the family.

I've got a slow start on my bus ride today, so hopefully it speeds up
some.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Arctic Tundra

Well I had a very long weekend and I am now making my way to work. I
left last Wednesday and went to Cedar until yesterday. The apartment
Jabe got for us is actually quite nice and our ward seemed very
welcoming so that was good too.

I got some work done at adult ed and contacted some people about jobs
I am looking into. All in all it was a pretty good trip although I am
a bit worn out from the driving.

Friday we had Kya's grduation and that was quite enjoyable. I think
she was surprised to see me there and I was glad I could make it. When
I was looking through the program before it started I noticed that
James had a brother graduating. I had been texting organizing a Nerd
party so I disclosed this info to the Nerd formerly known as dictator
and was given a mission to find James and "ambush" him.

Where's Waldo is a lot harder when he is not wearing the
characteristic red and white stripes. My mom deserves the credit for
finally spying him and I ran over to talk to him after it was all done
and invited him to a picnic I had been organizing for Saturday.

The next day we had a fun time at the picnic although for a good
portion of it I was watching and chasing Gwen, not the easiest way to
participate, not at all, but it seems like people had fun and that was
good. My title today comes from a conversation at the picnic, if you
wan more info ask Nate.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Moving

Well I came down to Cedar thisweekend for a variety of reasons. The
first plan a couple of weeks ago was to come for my niece's high
school graduation. I worked some things out, that let me come down
early and get some other things done.

I contacted some people about job openings so I can be really getting
moved while Jane is down here I am doing my work thing up north still
for now. I brought down some things to get us moved in a bit more and
our little apartment is really nice if a bit old.

Today we are going to go hang out with my friend and their families at
the park weather permitting (as I look out on the overcast sky). I
saw friend of mine at graduation that we had lost contact with for
awhile. So that was neat.

All in all I think as difficult as this is going to be to make the
move that it will be a lot of fun to b closer to family. We had a fun
barbeque after graduation yesterday. Gwen was loving the dogs my two
sisters have even when one of them was chasing her and once outright
tackled her.

I am excited for the prospects of moving back to Cedar and hope to get
situated in some extra-dayjobular endeavours. (yes I made up a word,
but the I think the form is acceptable). Now I just need a focus, a
direction to be going with those efforts.

Well for now I guess that will be it and I will get back to writing
later. Happy Saturday everyone.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Anxiety

So I was well on my way to work when I realized I forgot my bus pass
and id badge. Needless to say I am going to be getting off work later
than I expected and getting to cedar later than I had hoped.

That started me on other anxious thoughts and it might be a rough
morning getting over this stuff and the other things that fall out of
the woodwork with them.

It is a beautiful morning today fresh air and a little wet. I've been
thinking more this morning about needing to find a renter for our
condo. That would shore up things significantly. Life sure gets
complicated quickly when you decide to make big decisions and just go
for it.

It is doable though for all of the difficulty we are going to make it
work.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Posting

So the other day I worked and worked, but all to a good cause because
I am planning to leave from up here on Wednesday and with all the
hours I am getting in I won't have to use any vacation time. I get a
"free" five day weekend.

My last post was a text message from my phone, that is if it posted,
and if anyone was wondering about it. So by now everyone that reads my
blog probably knows about us moving back to Cedar. It has been an
interesting month or so that has been passing quickly as we made the
decision and went for it.

The next step is for me to find a job in Cedar and actually move. We
will see how that goes.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Long day can't wait to get home and have nap time. 12.5 hours off my 40 for the week. Long weekend next week.

Block

I wanted to write but I don't really know what about. It was a pretty
good day, I hope I can keep having some more good days. Things have
been, and will likely continue to be, rocky lately, but I guess I have
a bit more hope right now. I think I have just a sparkle of confidence
that maybe I can make something of my life as well.

Hagoni everyone

Super Guy
(on the move)

Monday

I am off to work again la de dah. I had a pleasant surprise when I got
on the bus to see one of my previos drivers. They have changes
occasionally of which route they drive and I also have change some
routes I use so it was nice to say good morning to a familiar face.

It looks like we might figure something out with moving down to Cedar
and hopefully I can be finding a job down there. I am not looking
forward to the job searching life again, but I guess it had to come
sometime.

Speaking of work, my job has Bren going relatively smooth the las
while since I get to work and not much has been changing around. Well
I am hoping for a nice enough week. Good luck.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Alive I think

Had a couple of sick days and I am glad to be working again I am not
fond of staying home and feeling like I am doing nothing. Haven't
been keeping up on my blog much lately and don't even know what to say.

Jane wants to move back to cedar so I guess that is the biggest thing
on the horizon for our family. We have to figure something for work
down there or how to work here and Jane live down there. It becomes
overwhelming very quickly although I think it is something we can do
and it would be good to have Gwen so close to her cousins. I think the
atmosphere will be better for both Jane and Gwen as well.

I have to wonder frequently what the future holds for me and I guess I
need to wait and see. We are going to try and rent our condo to make
the transition a little smoother. We will see, that is pretty much
where I have to stand.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Phone blog: done with work 40 hours. Thank goodness

For Better or Worse

So I am still alive apparently and will be off to work presently. This
week is taking it's toll however and I am glad that today is going to
be over at some point. At least the weather is nice that is something,
and I got a lot of reading in yesterday.

We'll see what the day brings.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

At Work #200

So since I was using my computer I am aware of the number of this post. Two hundred is actually quite a few since a large number of them were done in the last year and even in the last 8 months that I have been working my job.

Yippee...

That acknowledgement aside maybe I can still think of something to write.

Jane went to Cedar this week and she is starting to look at possible living arrangements so she could move back. We are going to be in for an interesting ride since we wouldn't have much chance of selling our condo. We are looking at renting it and making the move. If nothing else Jane will most likely make the move and I will follow as opportunity allows with work arrangements. I think the opportunity to get back will be good for the family and Gwen would have a lot of her cousins really close to play with. I miss Cedar too, it has been home for so long that I really would like to be back there. Distances seem so much smaller in Cedar nothing like my 3 hours of commuting every day, heck I didn't even have that when we were driving to Cedar everyday. (Although the bus was another story altogether).

I guess we will see what we can do and start pinching some pennies to make it happen.

Disconnect

So I didn't get to bed when I should have last night and today will
most likely be an interesting day to show for it.

Brian turned off... Not surprised that is why I named my post what I
did.

Good luck.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Been Awhile

Well I haven't written for awhile, but here I am. I had a somewhat
uncomfortable week so far. Monday I had a sick day Tuesday I went and
felt nasty the whole time and yesterday I took some more time to rest
it off.

As far as how things are going they aren't too bad right now. Just
trying to keep going mostly. Work is pretty much just doing the same
thing over and over and life is pretty much that way altogether.

Hopefully the future can open a little more going forward.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Sleep Deprivation

So yesterday was one in several days this past week or so where things
have been less than desirable. My head has not been doing well. I
think some of it is due to the amount of things I am trying to absorb,
process, and make sense of at the moment, but I think sleep is a factor.

Have you ever felt like you were doing things without a conscious
connection? I don't know if that explains the feeling quite right,
but things have really been going over the edge this week. I am hoping
that sleep will help but there may be other factors that contribute
more than I would like them to.

I did get a little more sleep this morning I think so hopefully today
will be a little better, although I am not going to get my hopes up
too much.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Catching the bus

So we had a different driver this morning and that may have made a
difference because he was at least a little earlier than the other one
has been lately. It might make just enough of a difference so I can
catch my earlier train for a ten hour day. We will see how it goes.

In other news I'm tired and may or may not be losing my mind.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Another week

I'm actually awake on the bus this morning I think it has been awhile
since I had that luxury. Starting a new week will be nice and maybe,
just maybe the future outlook of things may be better than it has been.

General conference was a good experience yesterday and Saturday. We
visited with Jane's parents yesterday and it was nice to get out of
the house and visit some.

I am hoping for a little bit of a spring week to finally get here the
storms of the last week were less than agreeable. I think am drawing a
blank so I will leave it at that for now.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

"News"

As I was getting out of the car their was an extended news piece about
guns and gun control laws. I think it is reasonable to had certain
controls in place and all that, but I want to comment on a sad bit of
verbage that is a silly perpective. "[insert big number] of murders
were commuted by guns last [favorite period of time]". Followed by
mentioning the FDA pulling tainted food products if they caused a
similar number of deaths.

Guns can't murder they are inanimate objects, neither is tainted food
equivalent to murder, nor is there a total ban on peanut butter
because of an isolated incident, and ... You can't advocate banning
guns because they "commit murder" that currently impossible outside of
science fiction.

Just thought I would let everyone know that last I checked inanimate
objects were just that inanimate.

Super Guy
(on the move)

LDS edition of the Bible in Spanish

I was extremely excited when I saw this. Wow the church is so true and that is so awesome.

Needing a Salesman

So I have been thinking again about what kind of job I would like to
be doing or the direction I would like to take. I did a special
project developing a spreadsheet for one of my previous bosses last
week and I go thinking about how fun that was.

I think a fun job would be a private consultant. Mostly I would
consult on technological matters, but could branch into other areas as
needed. As an example of what I mean I will use this spreadsheet
development.

Let's say in my personal or work life I run into something that I
don't quite know how to do like make a spreadsheet to do some simple
accounting. If I have a lifeline I can call under these circumstances
to a person that can do it for me or can firfuee it out for me then
than would be a nice help. Similarly if I have a feeling that
something could be working more efficently, but I can't figure out
exactly how to accomplish it. I call in my consultant and he can help
get the job done.

I could work for multiple clients on a retainer basis so I would
always be on call an check in with my clients on a weekly basis.

What I really need is a salesperson to get me clients and this would
be a pretty cool system. Personal "tech support" as well as other
consulting support.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Hour and a quarter

Almost done for the week. Strange day for tomorrow as I will be done
before I really get started, but I guess that is what happens when I
try a four day work week and miss slightly.

One thing that is nice about the short Friday is that I get out of the
house and get going but still have the day "off".

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Gas leak fiasco

So the other day I am sitting in my office and my one of the other
phone on out system rings. Being curious as always and because
everyone else was out of the office at this point I checked the number
on our caller id. Is was a long string of ones and I wondered but
didn't tthink much of it.

Through the next few minutes and in fact throughout the rest of the
afternoon I was getting phone calls on my cell, email messages and
text messages announcing there was a gas leak just off university
campus.

The first phone call contained a list of buildings to be evacuated and
I wasn't really anywhere near those so I figured u would keep working
and not bother since my bus route wouldn't be affected or anything.

Another phone message came announcing the campus closure, but being
in the hospital is an interesting phenomenon since we aren't really in
the same rule set at main campus. I probably could have left and
wouldn't have ha to argue my point but I figured that I have to have
40 hours a week and why leave?

So long story made longer thanks for the worries or interest, but not
much to tell, although a guy I work with was in class at the time of
the closure and did decide to go home. He worked late yesterday to
make up for it. Too bad.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Two days

I have used my early bus for the past 2 days and was actually able to
transition to the early train. Yesterday I have to run, but today it
was more of a leisurely stroll.

With this early bus and train and the later bus going home I am able
to get a ten hour day and a four day work week. The consistency is not
quite thee though and I will most likely end the week with a little
left time left over like last week.

Friday last week I had a two hour day so I rode in and did my time
before my coworkera even showed up. It was a little strange but a good
experience. It was nice because when I got off work I had most of the
day ahead of me and I was already awake and active, I hadn't been
vegetating at home. It gave me the desire and focus to stay out and
about for at least a little longer that day.

That is about it for now I guess.
Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Cold and Wet

But going nonetheless.

It was snowing when I got up here and had to transfer to my train. One
thing about trying the earlier mornings is the transfer I have to make
while my regular route takes me straight to work.

Luckily I had my beanie that was very helpful. I guess I will see if
anything comes up this week I only worked a couple of hours on Friday
so there is a good chance I will have more than a couple of emails
when I get to my desk.

All in all things are pretty good.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Fun Stuff

Yesterday I got to watch a presentaion by Apple about new software
they are going to release for iPhone and iPod touch. They have some
really neat features they are adding and the iPhone is getting neater
and neater. The presentaion also got me wanting to come up with some
cool program that I could make and try to get on the map.

If anybody has good ideas foe games or programs that would be nice to
have with you let's say in your cellphone let me know and maybe one of
the ideas would get me started.

I have been heading to work early this week and didn't wake up
properly this morning so I am on a bus I wouldn't normally take, but
gets me there anyway with one transfer. With the early mornings I can
shave some time off for later in the week and tomorrow should be a
very shortened day.

What else? No idea.

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Worn out

Well I got quite a bit done today and was very focused through the
whole of it. It was taxing, but felt good. It is also a nice day out
so things aren't too bad. I get to go home and watch Psych tonight so
that will be fun as well.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Springish

Maybe just maybe we are going to get spring after all. I walked out to
catch my bus without my sweater so that was just peachy today. One day
of the week is down and I am glad. It has been a nice day today overall.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Dawning

Night deepens
Silence reigns
Darkness abounds
Cold goes forth abroad

Waiting, wondering, praying
A glimmer of hope
Beginning to brighten
No sun, no stars, yet light

A special time
A dawnless dawn
Slowly life awakes
The still before the day

Morning breaks
Shadows flee
A new day
The sun breaks forth

Peace may fade
It often does
But it will come again

A time of thought
A time of peace
Hope will find it's home
A special time
A special place
The dawn before the dawn

Super Guy
(on the move)

3 weeks

That is what I have ahead of me until several things happen. I'll have
a mission reunion so that will be fun. I will get to try a new bus
route that actually runs straight from Eagle Mountain, I might even be
able to walk to the bus stop if I really want to. We will complete 1
year of living in our own house with all the interesting problems that
presents. Last but far from least Jane will be able to go to the
doctor.

Before the three weeks are up I need to get back on my feet a bit
luckily our car is fixed now and we are only looking at one annoying
problem I have been putting off, our suspected leak. It is obnoxious
living in a place where your house problems can manifest themselves in
someone else house the question becomes how do you coordinate who does
what in dealing with the problem etc.

All in all, the best I can do is pray for this coming year to be
better than the last and maybe in 3 weeks more of the path can start
angling upwards.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Do anything

Freed from self imposed restrictions.
Your mind allowed to dream.
"Absurd" ideas are seen at last
And given the chance to roam

Though it is not clear to walk
And they may not be achieved
Yet hope and dreams will free your heart
Give you something, to believe

Daring to hope, daring to dream
You may yet find your peace
A path to go, a difference to make
Wait for it, work for it, find it at last

Super Guy
(on the move)

Success

Sometimes it is hard to be around "successful" people. I have always
had difficulty with seeing others success and wondering when and if I
might find my success.

Success can mean different things to different people, but everyone
would most likely agree that they would like to be successful in some
form. I think one of my difficulties is that many of the people I know
are in very different worlds than mr and when I look out of mine I
wonder why it couldn't be more like the way I perceive theirs. Maybe
it is just my perception as well.

The hardest comparisons I subject myself to is when I look at people
older than me. There is a serious problem in the logic because I can't
see them in the "future" by at least a few years and wish I could be
there. I acknowledge that I am a few years behind, but since I can't
see my future in the slightest it still makes it hard.

I don't even know what my success would be, maybe I even am
"successful" in a way, but it doesn't feel like it. When life can be
summarized as "the daily grind" I have to think there should be
something more, if not now than at least hope for the future, I just
can't see it though.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Stuffage

I really don't have a much in mind to say, but things often come when
I start. Work isn't too bad since last Thursday. We had a meeting and
I was given an assignment that is going well and things are looking
brighter for the future.

The sunlight used to be coming over the mountain by the time I got to
work, not so anymore with the time change too bad. Mom has been up for
a few days it has been nice to have a visitor, we don't get many.

Pi day is Saturday, I will need to either get or bake a pie to
celebrate. I still have tons of pumpkin in the cupboard so that would
work. We just need to decide if there is anyone else we could invite
to join us.

Netflix has been neat the last week or so as I have watched a lot of
Dr.Who both online and by getting the DVDs. I've watched other shows
as well, yesterday we watched "The Shadow". That was kind of fun.

I am almost to work now, it would be nice if it could go as smoothly
as yesterday, in the end it was strange it was already 4 o'clock when
nothing had seemed to happen all day. Usually we have days with lots
of ups and downs, but yesterday was pretty calm peaceful actually.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Officially unofficial

So I am supposed to be managing overtime now as it was sort of, kind
of said that we are not supposed to be getting it anymore. So I am
trying an experiment today taking a later bus and seeing how that
works with clocking in and out with my usual afternoon bus.

Of course the bus was late so I don't know how reliable the numbers
will be, but stuff happens. In April I will have another bus option
out in Eagle Mountain and we will see how helpful that can be. I am
also still entertaining the dream of a four day work week. Nothing is
solid in any way, what can you do?

My month of being alone ended of Friday evening when my mom brought
Jane and Gwen home. It is going to be a little bit of a transition
week to get back in the groove with other people in the house again,
but it has been a lot of fun.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Home again, home again

Been working late a couple of days. Get to go home to my cold house
now. We will see what the rest of the week brings. Sleep hopefully.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Uh...

Hagoda

Super Guy
(on the move)

Fixed?

Well I have the car back, but it is far from wonderful it still has
some shakes. I am hoping that it is something simple like the oil. I
think I am going to get it home and leave it there for awhile since I
am not going to have much time this week with my planned schedule.

I am going to be working late most of the days this week and probably
wouldn't be a ble to take the car to get the oil changed etc.

Well we will see.

I got Jane's Little Big Planet levels published we will see what
people think of them. The third on might be a little rough, but they
are fun.

I've run aground hagoda.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Future

What do you do if you don't have dreams? No vision, goals, or
direction? Is that where I am? Sometimes it seems that way.

I need something to strive for, something that at very least seems
attainable. Hopefully I can find it.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Probationary extension

So my "supervisor" called me in today an said she was extending my
probationary time. However my other "supervisor" wasn't even part of
this situation. It is a bit of a joke when the person reviewing you
doesn't have a clue what you do.

Weird botherment

Super Guy
(on the move)

Homeward Bound

I figures I had been given the run around enough foe the day so I left
work "early". Hopefully I can do something about the car when I get
back down to Lehi. We will see.

Super Guy
(on the move)

It's Aliiiiive!!!

At least it got me to the bus stop anyway. I was going to leave my key
in the Intrepid this morning and call to get it towed, but I decided
to try and start it and it started up. It didn't sound or feel all
that healthy, but it is now a lot closer to places that can help fix
it. I just have to decide for certain where I am going to take it to.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Deus ex machina

Fantasy. Life has consequences and rough patches galore. Superman
doesn't swoop in at the last second to save the day, nor do things
like the economic stimulus package avert the disasters we see.

We love to hear the stories all the same be they fictitious or the
rare reality of the unexpected resolution. One of my favorite
versions of the this type of resolution is that found in "The Pirates
of Penzance" where a simple charge in the name of the queen and
another fantastical revelation cure all the ills of the entire story.

If life were a Gilbert and Sullivan I would just have to rough it out
until the finale, and it would be here sooner than later. Don forget
either that we would get some good music in the meantime. I don't have
the luxury of a script or a screenplay but sometimes I would mind a
bit of a synopsis or an outline.

Oh well, and whatever.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Something better

Do you ever get the feeling that there has got to be something better.
That is what I feel I'm relation to my job. I have been out for a
couple of sick days helping take care of Jane and Gwen, but I know as
soon as other people get to work today it will start it's downward
march which has been the norm for over a month now.

A year ago when this whole episode of my life started I thought I was
going somewhere with all of this, but now I look back and forward and
wonder if this isn't the biggest dead end I could have ever gone down.

Some days it feels like the past 5+ years mean nothing and I am just
hanging out hoping beyond all hope for some deus ex machina to rewrite
some pages of this horrible nightmare world I have found. There aren't
many of these "machinas" in the real world though and I am not holding
out for any.

If I could build one that would be another story, but I don't even
have an inkling of where to begin. I have a degree in mathematics
doesn't that mean something to someone? I wish I knew who that
someone was. I have some advanced computers skills and a great variety
of knowledge. I wish I could find the market for me.

I can imagine that somewhere there exists a job that would fit me just
right, but I need more than imaginary jobs. At the very leaat I need
a direction to be headed because I am stagnant or in retrograde.

Blathering Blatherskite

Super Guy
(on the move)

Uta owes me breakfast

And lunch for that matter. I don't know why I bother with trying to
use the earlier express bus this is now 2 out of three days that it
has been problematic. It was fifteen minutes late. I could have eaten
breakfast and got lunch ready with that time.

Sometimes the tardiness of buses can be helpful, but other times it is
ridiculous fifteen minutes on a beautiful morning for an "express" bus
is silly.

On another note ... never mind

Super Guy
(on the move)

Talking Down

So I had a bit of an epiphany yesterday about my problems at work. I
found that in my treatment by others an unusual paradox.

As a teenager I often was treated and felt older than I was, let's say
like an adult. Now that I am an adult there is a strange reversal that
I am being treated like I am a kid.

In a dictatorship what matters to the dictator is what matters to his/
her cohorts and valuable though education and experience might be it
doesn't have the same worth to different people.

I think the lack of appreciation and the superiority complexes are
some of the most bizarre things. More people need to cede to others
with more knowledge and experience when they are not experienced in
the field. Because you are expert on a topic does not mean that you
know everything, in fact it can simply means that you are intertwined
with that topic that you can't see the outside.

Just because you have been involved in something for a long time and
have tons of experience doesn't mean that you know the best way to do
things. Another person with less experience but fresh ideas can come
in and help you improve, if you let them.

One quality of good management is realizing that you don't know
everything and don't need to. Team built with people from different
background can cover more ground because people can play to their
stregths.

I am being paid for a job I am well qualified for while being
regulated to doing a job I am overqualified for. I guess I should be
happy at the fact that I am being paid more than what value I would
give the work, but I think I would rather have a job where I at least
feel respected.

It is sad to be treated as if you are inferior, not that I want to be
superior, just relatively equal, and maybe respected a little.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Earlier

I found out earlier this week that there is an earlier bus that I can
use and get to work earlier. It is an express bus and I don't have to
get up as early as another earlier bus would require. This may be an
advantageous strategy as I quietly explore the options of a four day
work week. I say quietly because I do not have anything remotely like
permission to move to 4 days, mostly I want to know how possible it
might be.

Well we will see what today brings always something new and rarely
anything worth the trouble. I will get in some extra time though
worth a few bucks.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Some experiences...

That aren't as bad.

Went to Costco last night and bought a bunch of stuff. It is nice to
have some money right now with our tax refund to do some extra
spending. I also got a replacement battery for the dead car and
hopefully it will be running well when I get it in later this week.

I have done running for my wii fit the last couple of nights and my
legs were dying last night. It felt good to feel the work out some
more.

I have a program ok my iPod that has the scriptures on of and I
finally downloaded the update and it is awesome, it has footnotes and
even the topical guide and bible dictionary.

I might be able to get in some overtime depending on how long Jane
decided to visit with my family we will see. Yesterday I actually got
something done so that was quite nice. I guess that will be it for now.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Some experiences...

I could do without.

So I started my car scraped the windows and grabbed the handle to get
in and head off for the day when lo and behold the door makes a lovely
noise saying "ha ha ha" I locked you out. Evil possesed car. Sorry for
waking you up mom,but thanks for getting me the dispatch number.
Luckily I was going early today to hit a meeting and after everything
I still made it on my normal bus. I'll miss the first part of the
meeting, but ask me if I care. The answer is no by the way.

So apparently my laptop isn't happy with me right now. Yesterday it
turned off while I was using it, I figured the battery had given up
for the day, but this morning I noticed as I tried to use it that it
was shut down not just asleep. After a couple of minutes it gave up on
me again today so the battery might be shot completely now. I will see
when I get a chance to plug it in.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Truth

Where is truth to be found? It seems more often than not lately that
to find truth would be a hard endeavor for anyone to pursue. For
example take the "obvious" reality of global warming. We often, aimed
at always, here about global warming as if it is set in stone. The
question is, is that true and how can we really know?

There are still people on the other side of the issue and to hear
about that fact relies on people not accepting everything that the tv
tells them and presents as the final word.

Bias and prejudice along with pride and conformity can kill logical
conversation and thoughtful consideration. Scientists do the best they
can with what tools and knowledge they have, but media presentation of
that information often treats us to a view that doesn't show the
shortcomings of investigation.

No science is absolute and the misconceptions that this is a "law" are
problematic since after some time in effect they may no longer be
questioned and tested if another idea is presented.

Sometimes we need to remember that questioning something is the way
we have gotten as far as we have and to subject everyone to our views
would hamper that driving force.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Not on a bus

We're still in Cedar, and I am waiting for my mom while she is in a
doctor's visit. I have Internet access so I figured I would just wait
so I can give her a ride home. It has been a pretty good weekend, but
it will be "good" to go home. I struggle to function outside of my
regular routines. Really struggle

Hagoda everybody

Super Guy
(on the move)

Day off

Took the day off today for a four day weekend. Have a good one.

Gay "marriage" discrimination?

No person can argue that prop 8 or similar legislation is
discrimination. To be discrimination you have to be treating one
person or group differently that another person or group. This is
simply not the case with the gay "marriage" issue.

It might be argued something like "you can get married and I can't, so
that is discrimination", but that couldn't b further from the truth.
Let's assume this person is a man "You can get married, just not to
another man, but I am in that exact same circumstance, I cannot marry
another man either". The law acts equally on all people, regardless of
their desires.

As a simple correlation let's take illegal drugs I would never be
remotely interested in using them just as I would never be remotely
interested in marrying a guy. On the other side I am free to purchase
and use aspirin. Someone else would like to use illegal drugs, instead
of aspirin, does that mean that laws against these drugs are
discriminatory against this person. The laws act the same on both
people and no claim for discrimination can be made.

There may be other valid starting points for the gay "marriage"
movement, but claiming discrimination is totally missing the mark.

Super Guy
(on the move)

...

Can't say much is going on... It has been a rather typical week... Going to Cedar this weekend. At least that is the plan. ...Such is... life I guess. Jane made some fun levels on Little Big Planet... I am at nearly 40 days of using Wii fit... Don't know that it is making much of a difference... stuff... and things...

"Birthday" Presents

I use the quotations because of the direction the presents went. Yesterday after I got off the bus I made an extra trip down to Orem to retrieve my iPod from the UTA lost and found. (I have a pair of pants whose pockets aren't the greatest at keeping things in)

While in Orem I decided to get some See's chocalates to surprise Jane and also decided to look at Deseret Book for the illustrated stories from the Book of Mormon (church distribution) for Gwen. I got the chocolates and went out through Deseret Book they didn't have much selection of church distribution stuff so that was a dead end, but they had some good bargain books in the main aisle and lets just say Jane and Gwen got books last night. On my way home I did stop to get a Krispy Kreme donut so I got something out of the bargain as well.

Last night Jane and I stayed up late. She was stuck inside of a game around 8 and I didn't really have anything to do so I took over reading "Ella Enchanted" since she had started it lately. We were up late reading because I was a little annoyed by the ups and downs and wanted to get to a good ending instead of leaving off unresolved. It is a fun story, but some of the occurrences in the process were making me annoyed.

Heigh ho, heigh ho... off to work I go

Monday is overish

And thankfully too.

Though it wasn't a bad day it is always nice to go home. I am really on a trip of wanting to spend money, maybe it was the lack of birthdayness this year. Saturday was less than peachy, and all that is going on otherwise has worn me down lately as well. Not much to say right now I don't think, but catch you later.

Sick Day

So I didn't have a very good night last night and I decided to take a sick day today. I have be getting run through the ringer lately. It looks like the car problem is the battery after all, but to go get it checked I have to try and get it out of the car. Car design=stupid I'll need a ratchet if I have any hope at all. We will see.

Dead Car

So apparently the Intrepid doesn't want to start this week. It gets to the point where it will almost turn over then goes back to the grating "I usually only do this a couple of seconds" noise. It doesn't seem to be the battery, because we tried to jump it, it shouldn't be out of gas because I filled it up last week. So I really don't know what it is. It will make for some fun arrangements when Jane needs the car, but I should be able to work out some rides with people in the ward just fine. Otherwise life is going quite well. Not really anything else to say for now so Hagomo.

Complicated

We often don't realize how complicated the world is that "revolves around us". The daily grind is a continuos blind. When we are so embroiled in our own world we don't notice what is on the outside and if we choose our outside points of reference incorrectly then we will be in for a harsh wake up call. I honestly don't know where the good contacts for information are, but I have been reading editorials by two economists that I would tend to believe more than what has been termed "the media" or the "mainstream media". It is much easier to believe and trust one or two people than a "crowd" or "mob". Though trust itself can come into question in our lives.

If the government keeps getting bigger and keeps taking over control then what happens? Many people to one degree or another don't understand that with freedom comes responsibility for your actions, and with responsibility for your actions comes a responsibility for the consequences. Accountability headed to disaster in "bailouts". When we make a choice there is a consequence people want to avoid consequences I think that is a spoiled mentality and I would attribute it to the "natural man".

Just a few examples of what I mean.

Abortion for the various reasons could be trying to avoid the consequence of an choice
I have heard radio ads for a hangover cure, lets avoid the consequence of drinking alchohol
Radio ads about a drug that can get rid of fat, (no need to exercise is implied) avoid the consequences of not taking care of your body anyone?
Bailout money, gimme gimme gimme, avoiding the consequences of bad economic decisions

Actually I might be able to come up with a full blown analogy, but I will simply refer you to the parable of the 10 virgins. Each virgin made her own choices, 5 wise, 5 foolish. There were consequences and when facing those consequences there were no bailouts.

Consequences follow all actions and maybe if we had to face those we could learn and progress, that won't happen in businesses and governments if the rest of us are tapped to cover other peoples mistakes and follies.

Cool Article

This article really goes with the statement "Enlightened trial and error succeeds over the lone genius". I thought it was neat.

Free Grand Slam

So I did get to Denny's today for a free grand slam breakfast. (6am-2pm today)

I went right at 6 this morning it was tasty and free. I sat with a sister from the church since she was a party of one as well. It did take a long time though since we got lost in the corner and while waiting other people after us were served well ahead of us. She had a fascinating life story and it was fun to listen. I am now on a bus, not a preferred one, but a suitable one non the less, and had a good experience overall even though it took nearly an hour of my day.

Recently someone I work with brought up the topic of "What is your time worth" with me and I have been weighing the free breakfast against the money I could have made by being at work already, but I don't think it is an accurately reflection of reality. Time is worth more than money because money is not lasting. I had the opportunity today to become acquainted with a good person and hear a testimony of the truth. Most likely I won't even see that sister again and we didn't form a lasting acquaintance I can look at this and know that my day was lit by someone outside my regular routine, and she had the opportunity to not have to have breakfast by herself. I also realize looking back right now that the passing acquaintance in this life can potentially become a more lasting experience in out future state. It will be amazing to have friendships and conversation with people outside our temporal social spheres.

Hagoda everyone

Back we go

The one comfort I can find is that my "job" is relatively mindless now, so I can just go type in information. I am looking back towards starting to do some programming again as a way that I might make something out of my life even as it is now up in the air. I don't think the north is all that wonderful for us, and I would much rather return to the smaller town life. We have awhile to go, but if I can develop some sort of skill that will get us in a better position then that would be great.

Hagoda everyone

40 hours no more no less

I left work earlier than usual today, because even though I get paid to stay, I don't know that they deserve my time. Frankly I don't know if there is anything I can do other than resign myself to a mindless job of doing what I have been told. Really I should be and may get to the point that I will be grateful that I am free of any responsibility regarding extended duties, and the stresses of trying to actually make things better. I guess mostly I am feeling a little bit under appreciated and wondering what kind of job could I get where my contribution would be valued again. I want to be valuable in my employment, but to do what they are asking of me takes very little of what I have worked to achieve up to this point. I would love to use my skills to bolster and improve something, but at this point I am regulated to the suffocation point.

Do they think I am a teenager? Does experience, a degree, good ideas,and a having a brain mean nothing to these people? I honestly felt and still sometimes feel that I have something to offer, but some peoples attitudes and interactions make me wonder.

Unfortunately Friday is only once a week

This week has been a roller coaster, but for the most part I have been able to separate myself from work dramas. Separate not meaning physically, just emotionally as much as possible. My sister-in-law had a link to an editorial writer that has a lot to say about political stuff. I have to wonder with the "war of words" that this world is full of who if anyone has "the truth". I think I hve agreed with a lot he says, I especially like his treatment of gay "marriage" and all the implications that it has, they were actually straightforward in there explanations of why the arguments don't quite fit. Think what you may, he definitely provides a different opinion that some.

I think I am done. Suerte!

But today isn't

Life is going well enough and getting myself removed from the anxieties of work is making a big difference. We had a meeting yesterday that I got through well enough and we might have some progress from these efforts after all. We will see, and I am extremely glad that I am getting out of the personalizing that I was doing with the job, several things are overwhelmingly huge right now and to have a perspective of no end in sight has worn me down along with the other difficulties of the job.

Yesterday I watched a neat Nightline piece called "The Deep Dive" from a friends suggestion. It is about innovation, invention, and design. I liked the thoughts against typical corporate culture, in favor of a new system. This link goes to the first of three segments on youtube and the others are accessible through the related videos. It had a great statement about innovation "Enlightened trial and error succeeds over the planning of the lone genius" I like that.

Good luck everyone...If you are depending on luck :D

Yesterday is over...Thankfully

So Gwen didn't have the greatest day yesterday and so Jane didn't either. In the end Gwen went to bed without her binky though, so that was new and interesting, maybe it is the first sign that we can start trying to get her off them. I don't know all that was going on, but hopefully sleep will help the household have a better day today, and especially a better night.

Work will most likely be a unique experience tonight and getting through a meeting we have scheduled today might be rough, but overall things are looking up from here I think.

Writers Block

Bck n th swng

So I am now getting back into the habit of writing every day and hopefully my content quality can go up so I am not only expressing disgust, stress, and depression. Last night was pretty good I hit Albertsons on the way home and bought a bunch of cereal and things for the house. It seems like I spend a lot of money on food lately, but since that is the only thing I spend money on regularly I guess I should be grateful. I bought a big bag of rice since Jane decided to like rice for the time being and a few other things as well. Jane tried out our slicing board and made potato chips last night, they were quite good.

Wii fit has been quite fun over the past several weeks, but I have yet to see any weight results from adding daily exercise to my routine, I think it has helped with some of the stress I have been facing though. I really need to work on my food consumption next and eliminate all the treats and snacks when I am at home. Eating at work is pretty much under control which is nice and if I can work on eating when I am at home I will be much better off. I did well last night thankfully.

I got feeds on a few more blogs yesterday and am enjoying reading different peoples stuff. Now I just need to get writing and enjoy the experience again.

Alejarse

This was a better word than I could come up with in English so I am including it for your benefit. The best fit for the specific sentiment I wanted to express in English, that I have found so far, would be withdraw. I am making a concentrated effort this week to withdraw from the stresses and strains and politics of my job and really just let it go. It will be a long time, if it ever happens, before my workplace will change and honestly it is not worth the effort to "kick against the pricks" because they aren't going to change.

On a much lighter note I am looking for hobbies other than reading/writing blogs. I would like to make an attempt at programming, podcasting, or some other technology thing. Maybe I should make a renewed effort to making my audio books that I thought of doing once. I wish I knew how to market myself, because my dream job would be "Technology Consultant". I could teach people all sorts of things that they can do with their computer systems. How to really be a power user or come in and complete special projects for them on demand. My experience is so varied that it is hard to quantify it as any field in particular. I have lots of ability and drive it is really the vision that I am missing and something to try and accomplish.

Lost Perspective

Yeah I know mine isn't the best in the world and most likely won't change overnight, but I need to find something to latch onto and filter out the rest of the muck. I have wanted since this summer to look into programming applications for iPhone and iPod touch. I have a computer that would work great and I think I could learn the language pretty well the only struggle I have is that I don't have all that many innovative application ideas, and I really want my contribution to be innovative. There is also the budding desire I am experiencing to get back into making videos and things. I really enjoyed experiences in High School making movies with my friends and enjoying the living for the minute type of existence.

Work has become very problematic these last few weeks and the stresses of accomplishing a job when people don't seem to understand what you do or support you in doing it can be a daunting task. I am hoping this week to detach any personal investment in this job and simply let it be a job, do what I can and forget the rest. If I can do that then I might be able to conserve some energy to approach something in life worth my time. I really want to create something and experience life again. I think one of the hardest experiences with moving and being so far from Cedar and separated as much as we are is the severe isolation we are experiencing.

Isolation takes a toll on everyone, and I think a great deal of my difficulties is the isolation I feel. In Cedar we were able to visit family very frequently, and friends quite often too, I also had friends at school and at work. Eagle Mountain is a completely different experience as we are far from my family and not extremely close to Jane's either. Our ward in Cedar was complimentary to our non social personas since I had known many of the people in the ward for a long time and the demographics fit very well with our own. Here the extent of my social sphere is work with two other people in the cave I work in and others I interact with on a less frequent basis, and church on Sundays.

There are no random meetings at Walmart no regular game days with friends or family. I have wondered how to make friends again, but my personality has such a strong conflict with social things. Jane and I have our fun games to play with people yet it is so hard to know who to invite and how to invite or what. I miss having a more simple life. I miss school and the naturally social environments that I was put in where I was forced into those experiences that helped me enjoy life more. I guess when you only truly interact with so many people in a day or a week your world shrinks a little and becomes colder and harder and much less manageable.

I really wish I knew how to reach out more and be more social and things. I guess I just need to start somewhere. ... Sorry I think I need to go...

No Comprendo!

That is what one of my supervisor should say more often, but she plugs along assuming she understands it all. I can't help but feel it is a little like talking to my Grandma, and I feel for my mother. I say this because there are moments when everything is really quite clear or we have made it as clear as possible and then she totally misunderstands and is totally confident that she is right. Sometimes there is just no comprehension and yet on she goes. I actually was a little terse today and tried to lay it on the line a little more than I would normally, because she just doesn't seem to get it. We will see in about a week where all of this ends up and what I have to do to adapt and cope. Sad that cope is the word that comes to mind, but right now that is about how the situation works.

It is funny writing this right now I am actually aloof of the problems and a lot better than writing in the mornings. Things ended alright today and I am feeling good even if it is a weekend (yeah be confused and see if I care). I just have to separate myself from people that don't understand and make things work for myself and we might just make it.

Good luck all ... And I think I will be happy for nap time tonight

Poor Dying Laptop

So my laptop has severe power issues, if any of you know about my moms old laptop the battery gave out to the point that it didn't really function w/out being plugged in. My laptop is about there, at a full charge I can get about 30-60 minutes today it was considerably less and even interrupted me while I was writing this. I will probably breakdown eventually and buy a new battery, but not yet. I am excited today I got was able to download my last w-2 so I will be able to do my taxes very soon, although I should probably wait for my 1099 to come in. We should get some kind of rebate that will help boost us up, even though we won't get the $7500 tax credit that would have been very welcome. What is special about 4/8/2008 really? It makes no sense and it a huge slap in the face since I was ahead of it by less than 2 weeks. I guess we just have to make do and realize that this is just more evidence that government isn't the solution. Maybe if the rebate is enough I might even be able to get a new battery for my poor little faithful friend.

This laptop is going to be 3 in June, but it still works quite well and gets me through what I need to do. It has been quite a good investment overall.

Two days left this week

This week hasn't been off the charts bad so in comparison it could even be labeled good. I will be grateful however when it is over since it has really been jumpy up and down. Jane had a pretty good birthday yesterday I think, so I was glad about that. Not much else to say right now I guess so... later.

Derailed

That's what I feel like right now that I was headed somewhere and now
I am off the side of the tracks wondering where I was going, what
happened that put me where I'm at, and if adrenaline can help you lift
a caboose off you back.

It seems that at some point I must have had some kind of aspirations,
but now where am I, where am I going, and why?

Sorry more than a little lost right now.

Super Guy
(somewhere)

Where things stand

So last week was ... not so great. Honestly this week doesn't seem that it will be all that much better. I think I figured out some of my difficulties talking with Jane this weekend in that my job is too poorly defined right now. Any given day I can go in to work and not know what it is I am going to do until I start doing it. I don't know that I have ever had a job that was so poorly established when I took it over, even when I have had a job that never existed before the people at least knew what they wanted it to be. Here I cam into a job that management doesn't have a glimmer of knowing what it is I do, and can't be bothered with organizing the structure and management so I can do it.

That being said ...blah and I probably am going to try avoiding talking about work when I am not at work because it has become a plague that is slowly eating my sanity away into nothing. Sad part is that the duties and the job are pretty cool maybe even enjoyable when I am not dealing with the people that make it so unbearable and the other issues.

I have been having all sorts of problems and stresses for nearly a year now and my goodness I am getting worn out to no end. Who knew life could become so messed up so quickly. What I thought were good opportunities have all come back to take a bite out of my comfort and happiness. It seems that almost every choice and direction has been not only difficult, but a complete mistake and that if anything I have lost an immense amount of ground on my life. Life is day to day now, and I can't see far beyond that. Too many walls and not enough doorways. Even fewer windows (if you could see my office you would understand).

...

Playstation 3 (to utterly change topics) is a pretty cool gaming system, I like to be able to turn the thing on and play without needing to change discs and things. Jane and I have been working more on a game called PixelJunk Monsters. It is a tower defense game. I have almost finished the basic game and the expansion set levels by myself and on the 2 player version we have beat it through completely at least 2 times and are now working on the "Hard Core" difficulty settings. We even started doing step exercises with Wii Fit while playing. (Yes we have a Wii and a PS3, plenty of story not going to bother telling it)

I decided to look up some episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000 on youtube last week. It is a pretty goofy show, but it is fun to see what someone must have thought was a good idea for a movie at some point in time. How to you like the laziness of me just including Wikipedia links? I figure if you want to know more that is an easy way to do it.

I enjoy Wikipedia, it has all kinds of information on so many different topics, just recently for example I looked up things about computer file compression. Pretty interesting how you can take information and condense it. There is even an entry for Kosher Dill pickles.

Great Stuff that is what I say.

Hagoda

Fat hits the fryer

I don't even want to try and think about what to say, but hopefully today brings some resolution.

Worn out

I'm at home and ready for the week to be over sad that tomorrow is
just Friday. The three day weekend will be more than welcome after
today and what tomorrow will likely bring.

Foreboding is more than a feeling it is a way of life.

Super Guy
(on the move)

If I were a drinker

Not a great we let's just leave it at that.

Super Guy
(on the move)

So um... Yesterday

So I didn't post yesterday and that is because I didn't go to work. I ended up taking a sick day, although it was more of an emotional breakdown day. I got to bed a little later than I wanted to on Sunday night so I decided to set my alarm later and do exercises Monday evening instead of morning. Morning came and I woke up at the earlier exercise time, and I tried to get back to sleep, didn't happen. I finally did get out of bed had my shower and ended up heading out the door late.

As I drove around the corner I realized I was going to miss my bus and since the next one didn't come for another 30 minutes I might as well turn around and go back to the house. This is about where I snapped for any and all of the reasons I can imagine. I was in no shape to go to work as I walked in the house mentally broken. I didn't quite feel right taking a sick day for that, but it probably was what I had to do. Lots of stresses that are piling up right now and I can't quite make headway on any of them it seems. I will just have to rewind and take it one step at a time. First this bus ride then the first hour then...

Good luck (if your depending on luck)

Deaf!!! (No the other kind)

Meeting with the manager over our program yesterday was a bit of a fiasco. I thought I had explained myself, the vision I have going forward the progress we have been making and then I get "So what I am getting from you is that you lack direction" (meaning supervision in her mind). First I was taken back because I don't remember saying that even remotely, and clarified that only one part of our job is missing direction and still needs to be defined however we have more than enough direction and vision of other things to be working on in the meantime. Apparently she didn't comprehend anything I said because our lack of guidance and direction was the only thing on her mind as we left the meeting. I of course did not know this until lunchtime when my supervisor told me she said that I had said I didn't have enough supervision or direction... What deaf ears my words had fallen on... Honestly selective hearing is worse than deafness, because if I were speaking with a deaf person there would be a little bit of an explanation.

Before this lunchtime revelation I had already started writing an email in followup to our meeting and it became as detailed and clear as I could get it by the end of the day. Perhaps the written word will hold some water, or I can at least hold her to it.

I just pray that I can detach myself enough that whatever happens won't affect me too much. I am just waiting for the micromanagement to start it is a looming cloud on the horizon that bears with it a storm that will more than hamper the trip I have started to take towards progress.

Good Luck people

Now what

Well today I might get an idea of what our manager wants my job to be
since I am slightly senior in my department. It is amazing how strange
the organization surrounding my job is structured. There is a weird
chain of command, and the people at top probably don't have much of an
idea what we even do, so even if the chain worked better it might not
even make a difference.

I guess I am a little frustrated with being in a group that is outside
the mainstream and being considered less seriously because of it. We
will see if I get to talk today in my "interview" and see what happens.

Sometimes I wish there was a rewind or a save/load function for life,
I think I would go back a year and try it all over again because I
totally missed the mark on almost everything. I don't know how or
when I will be able to move on to a little more stability, but I can't
wait for it.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Day 3

Yesterday wasn't nice compared to Monday, although still not the greatest experience in the world it is amazing how much effect snow can have on the commute up here. Luckily I have my laptop and ipod to keep me company. I had some work meetings yesterday and have a little more hope for things to work out, but not tons. The difficulties really come down to politics and ignorance. There is no clear administration over our "department" that has any say in the matter and without strong backing I don't see things changing anytime soon.

It is interesting to be in a situation where the chain of command won't work simply because the command doesn't know what you do or see the importance of it. I never understood the full need for structure until I got this job now I would love to have a manager that has the authority necessary to make changes, I miss the direct contact I have had with the decision makers in my previous jobs. Here it seems the decision maker sometimes doesn't even have the authority (or use it) to make changes and might not even understand that changes need to be made.

Well we will see what happens and if I can get anywhere in this mess.

Long week

We are on day 2 of tv work week, so why does it feel like a lot
farther along than that? Maybe it had to do with the fact that I
didn't get home yesterday until 4 hours after I left work. Bus rides
of nearly 3 hours can take a toll on a person. Distance and snow do
not mesh well up here.

This week may yield some benefits though as I hopefully get closer to
being able to do my job. I am doing some trainings on our database
program and meeting with someone to discuss the future of using the
database.

Of course it being a good day wasn't going to quite work since I had
to forget my bus pass and feel like a complete idiot. I hate when I do
that, and after a good start to the day it is even more frustrating,
luckily ylthe bus driver was nice enough to let me on as I showed him
my extra work badge I luckily had on me. It would have been even
easier had he been a more regular driver, we used to have one that was
there every morning and at least pretended to know you (most likely
did). Hopefully some of the forgotten pass stress will be gone by the
time I get to work and I can have an otherwise uneventful day.

Super Guy
(on the move)

Exercising

Jane decided she wanted a wii fit so I started looking at the end of last week, but she was the first to find one when the Walmart in Springville got a big shipment in and she just decided to check when she went with her sister. I figured since we were getting it that I would "resolve" to exercise using it. I had already decided that I was needing to exercise, but getting into a routine was a big problem. Having a set program for exercise will help since I don't have to figure out what exercises to do, I just have to go do it. I have to sacrifice a little more sleep, but hopefully it will be worth it.

Really cool website

My sister-in-law sent me a link to a church website for the youth that is really cool. It is called A Brand New Year as I understand it that was the title of the youth New Year's Eve program. The site has some great music to listen to and download as well as shorter versions you can use as ringtones. They have videos and things for reading. I hope the youth understand how cool it is that we have such a vibrant and aware church that wants to reach out to them in a way that they might be more familiar with, even including widgets that can be placed on Facebook etc. Heavenly Father loves us and looks out for us in a variety of ways through the leadership of the church, and there are good sources of uplifting entertainment and media, sometimes we just have to look harder.

Post 125

I figured labeling this post with its number is something that really identifies my numerical leanings. 125 is a cool number it is a cube, and of a prime no less, and I like numbers that can relate directly to quarters maybe because I can deal with them very quickly.

There is a square number of passengers on the bus today, once again a square of a prime. All nine of us unfortunate ones on our way to work for one day before the weekend. Not bad though when it comes down to it I would rather come back for one than to deal with two. Jane had some of her nephews and niece over for a couple of days this week and they had a lot of fun. I have been able to explore my Christmas present "Little Big Planet" and it is a really fun game.

The neetest parts of the game are that you can build your own levels and objects with all sorts of tools and materials. I was able to make little car things yesterday that would go really quite fast. I think the game will be really fun to work with and build fun contraptions. Writers block is coming on, I think in part because my nose and one of my eyes is acting funny (like an allergy thing or something).

Hagoda